Those of us who are in the dating world often wonder what it is that we’re supposed to be looking for, in one word: love.
As children we experience our first love, familial love. Those affections that are directed towards the people we grow up around and those who raise us. It is a devotion that we feel, almost from birth. Then there is platonic love. It is the affection we have for our closest friends that makes us willing to put up with their crap and keep coming back for more because these are the people that mean so much to us. Unrequited love is commonly known as a crush. It is when we feel a romantic attachment to someone who does not reciprocate. Lust is the feeling that we usually confuse with love when we are in the beginning stages of a new relationship. It is the feeling that makes us want to break each other’s personal barriers and get down and dirty. That new relationship energy does fade over time though.
True love is something that is not easily defined. Love is that feeling that makes us want to talk to someone all the time. It makes us want to hear their voice or see them often. It is the reason we want to touch them. Love is why seeing her smeared mascara when she wakes up or the pillow creases on his face in the morning endear them to us. For me, love is why no matter what my partner does, I can forgive him. It is why I don’t mind his snoring. Love even makes us laugh at their annoying habits sometimes. My partner is a leg bouncer. He does it all the time when he’s sitting down and it drives me insane because I constantly have to ask him to stop so the couch is still or the table isn’t shaking. Yet when he goes out of town, I miss it.
If you are dating someone and wonder if you are starting to cross the line into the love zone, you need to ask yourself these questions. Do you call just to hear their voice or text just to say hi? Do you feel lonely when they aren’t around? Do you want to see them as often as you can? Will you rearrange your schedule to spend time together? Is it important that your friends and family like them? Do you want to touch them, even in the most casual of ways? Do you find yourself seeing them at their worst and it draws you to them even more? Do you have a hard time picturing your life without them in it?
Love isn’t always easy. It can make things really hard but it also makes them worth going through. So I wish you all the best in your love quest, I promise it is worth it, in the end.
